Take your foot off the brakes!

(An expanded and/or edited version of this post appears in Rhan’s new book, All In Good Time – a Book About Playing Music for the Aspiring Ukulele Player. It is available at: www.rhanwilson.com/allingoodtime )

So often I have been asked to help someone learn something about music: new chords, strumming, singing, etc., but almost always the first thing they say to me (and often repeated throughout the lesson) is something to the effect of, “I can’t do this.”

There are countless variations to these negations; sometimes they say, “I am horrible at rhythm,” or they will constantly shake their head at the mere mention of a new term they hadn’t heard before.

Now I understand the tendency to want to “warn” me of one’s problem areas, but c’mon – it’s like asking me to help you push your car and having your foot on the brakes! Not only is it not necessary, but it actually prohibits me from helping you.

If you want to learn something, you have to take your metaphorical foot off the brakes and HELP PUSH! That’s right – aim yourself in the direction you want to go, and push! And just like a car – it’s a little hard at first, but as you gain some momentum, it gets easier and easier.

This is always the first thing I teach people, and it often takes up a good portion of the first (and subsequent) lesson/s, because I have found that once I can get my student to “get their foot off their brakes” – then the actual learning of material proceeds rather easily.

We have all formed some bad habits. I, too, have to always watch what, and how, I phrase things.

Here are some suggestions:

Instead of saying:  “I am no good at….”
Say: “I wasn’t good at…”
Or: “I haven’t been good at…”

Instead of saying: “I can’t……”
Say: “I will try to…..”
Or better yet: “I can…..”

Instead of saying:  “I have no rhythm.”
Say:  “I’d like to improve my rhythm.”
Or: “I am improving on my rhythm.”

These are subtle changes, and you might not think them that important, but they make a HUGE difference in how we learn. By simply stating our intentions in the positive, we have effectively taken off the brake and are free to move in the desired direction.

Now, what was it you wanted help with?

Playing with others.

(An expanded and edited version of this post appears in Rhan’s new book, All In Good Time – a Book About Playing Music for the Aspiring Ukulele Player. It is available at: www.rhanwilson.com/allingoodtime )

 

Playing with others: we do it often, joining play-alongs and jams,  yet we often jump in blind with no one to guide us through the basics. I offer here a way to think about the social act of playing music together, by way of describing a typical, healthy conversation. Then, I compare it to playing music together.

THE CONVERSATION
If I were talking to myself, I could ramble on and on, switch topics any time I wanted, and start and stop at will. (And I do that often.) However, if I wanted to have a healthy conversation with someone else or a group of people, the rules change a little. Let’s examine some of the things we do when conversing:

LISTEN.
Have an idea of what is being discussed before jumping into the conversation. What is the topic? At what level are people talking – both in volume and in intellect? That way, when you join in, you are able to do so without causing a distraction.

TAKE TURNS.
It’s a great conversation when someone can make a statement and then allow someone else to comment. (We’ve all experienced the constant talker who never pauses to let anyone say anything.) You may be an expert at a given topic, but unless you’re teaching or giving a lecture – don’t hog the conversation.

LISTEN.
I’ll say it again – listen. Has anything changed? Are we now talking about something else? If so, update! And if you want to get back to an earlier thought, you might say, “I’d like to say something else about ______ before moving on.” This let’s others know you have been paying attention.

BRIEF INTERJECTIONS
One needn’t be absolutely silent when someone else is talking. A quick “right on!” and nod of the head signals your agreement without hijacking the conversation. It lets the speaker know you are listening and can build enthusiasm.

LISTEN. (Have you noticed that I keep coming back to this?)
Be interested even if you’re not the one talking. Ever notice how some people get frustrated and impatient when someone else is talking? It seems they are not really listening at all but rather only waiting for a break so they can get back to what they were saying.

SENSE THE ENDING
Know when the conversation is ending. I like a long conversation myself, but when people have stood up, put on their coats, and are headed for the door, it might be prudent to hold off on starting up the conversation again. I can wait till the next time you all get together.

Playing music with others is very much like having a conversation.

LISTEN!
In the same way you assess a verbal conversation before jumping in, listen for musical cues as to what is already going on. What is the tempo? At what volume are the other people playing? Are you playing with beginners or with more advanced players.?

This doesn’t have to take long  – just a moment – long enough to be aware of what you are joining.

TAKE TURNS.
Listen – play – listen – play…. Here’s one way to think of it: if you are playing by yourself, you can pretty much play as much as you want (100%), but as soon as there’s someone else, I’d like to think that the sound space be split 50-50.
Be careful not to hog the musical conversation. Leave room for others to add to the sound and be part of the dialogue. Sometimes, the rate of “taking turns” can happen very quickly. Other times, it occurs over several measures.

LISTEN TO THE TEMPO!
We are not machines. Our tempos change slightly. We all may start together, but we have to monitor the tempo constantly, just as we correct our steering when driving down a long straight highway.

BRIEF INTERJECTIONS.
Throwing in a brief 3 or 4 note response (lead) now and then after a notable lyric can be cool. It says, “I’m listening” and “I agree” much like a spirited “Amen” during a sermon.

We might compare soloing (playing lead) with talking. You might have something interesting to play/say, but if you dominate the conversation, interrupt while others are playing/talking, solo too long, etc. – you might as well be playing by yourself.

LISTEN.
Great music is all about the space in between the notes. Be interested in what others are saying and playing and comment/play when it is called for.
(LEAD PLAYERS: Even if you are the only lead player in a group – try to make what you say/play count. Leave some space now and then so other nuances in the music can be heard. Sometimes playing music means NOT playing music.)

SENSE THE ENDING.
Watch the leader (or anyone and everyone) for cues as to what to play, when. Pay attention to when the song is about to end and try to finish with the others. Even though you may want to add that extra verse or chorus; if everyone has all stopped together – please don’t be that one or two players who insist on ending it “their” way, even though everyone else has already done so. You might as well be playing by yourself.

Remember – you are part of a group. Do your best to make everyone sound good. To quote Spock: “The needs of the many outweigh the needs of the few. Or the one.”

Finally, I acknowledge that this post represents only my opinion, though that is based on 45+ of playing music in both casual and professional settings. There are many types of jams, just as there are many types of conversations.

Your turn – what are your thoughts?

Rhan

I need a new strum! – Part 1

“I need to learn some new strums! Can you teach me?”

This is one of the most common requests I hear from uke players who feel they have become stagnant and are not moving ahead with their playing.

And my answer is always the same: WORK ON YOUR RHYTHM!

That’s all “strumming” is – rhythm. So many people want to teach down-down-up-down… that sort of thing, but that simply teaches you to memorize a pattern. If you take the time to learn how to play with rhythm, I guarantee that you will have so many “strumming” options, you won’t know what to do with them all.

I have attached a video to demonstrate, but allow me to write out a little instruction to get you started:

Start by playing just ONE chord. Let’s make it a Bb. I choose a Bb because it uses all strings and because of that, you can dampen the sound as we go. (see video)

Strum  “one – two – three – four” over and over, slowly, keeping a real even beat and knowing where ONE is at all times. Tap your foot with each count. Each time you strum the chord, lift up on your left hand just a little to stop the ringing of the chord.

This should sound like short little jabs at the chord.

Now accent on JUST THE ONE. (an accent means that you play it a little louder).

ONE – two – three – four – ONE – two – three – four – ONE – two – three – four – … and so forth. Do this evenly and cleanly. Do it until you can think of something else while doing it, like look around the room and notice what’s outside the window, yet still be completely aware of the accent and where the “one” is. (And continue to tap your foot right on the beat!)

Now without stopping, accent ONE – TWO – three – four – ONE – TWO – three – four – ONE – TWO – three – four – …

Can you guess what’s next? ONE – TWO – THREE – four – ONE – TWO – THREE – four – ONE – TWO – THREE – four – …

and finally, accent ALL FOUR BEATS.

Then, accent just the “two” and “four”: one – TWO – three – FOUR – one – TWO – three – FOUR – one – TWO – three – FOUR – …

Again, do this over and over until you can do it effortlessly. And if you’re one of those who get bored easily – DON’T! If you want to develop your sense of rhythm and learn to “strum”, then you need to pay attention to the details: listen for each stroke, are all the strings sounding nice and clean? Are you keeping an even rhythm? Can you do these exercises and keep your foot going while gazing out the window and imagining you are the best “strummer” in the world?

Until you can do all that, don’t you even think about being bored!

Have fun.

Here’s the video: